What is pegging? Expert tips for a stress-free, pleasurable first time

With pegging becoming more and more popular, we take a deep dive and explain all about the anal sex act.

Pegging has penetrated the mainstream public conscience as of late – even trending on Twitter – but for many it remains shrouded in mystery.

In 2021, a Lovehoney survey showed that 45 per cent of people having no idea what pegging actually is.

Traditionally, pegging is when a person with a vagina dons a strap-on and anally penetrates a person with a penis, and it has grown in popularity among straight couples who are excited at the prospect of switching up their gender roles.

But pegging does not discriminate, and can be experimented with by people of any gender identity or sexual orientation.

If the person being pegged does have a penis, however, the strap-on dildo can be used to stimulate the anal G-spot, otherwise known as the prostate, located about two or three inches inside and towards the front of the body.

What is pegging, and how to get involved

As with any sex act, communication is key, and if anal penetration is new to both of you it’s vital to take it slow. In other words, start small and use a whole lot of lube.

Charlie Glickman, PhD, is a sex and relationship coach and pegging expert. He told Cosmopolitan: “One of the ways you can help your partner is by going into the experience without pushing for a particular outcome.

“If you’ve been stuck in rush hour traffic or if you’re stressed out, your body is going to tighten up and anal play will be more uncomfortable and then it can hurt.

“The trick is to not create an atmosphere of pressure. Let their body guide the experience so they can relax and be open to it.”

Glickman also warned that if the person wearing the strap-on has never worn one before, and never owned a penis, they’re likely to feel a little silly at first.

He added: “Wearing a strap-on, having an erection, it’s a different experience for people who didn’t grow up with penises …

“So, I recommend they practice wearing it and moving with it by themselves first.”

“That way, you’ll look much more suave.”

Glickman also believes that pegging isn’t only about pleasure, and that it can truly “save the world”.

He wrote on his blog: “Let’s not forget that the more we can let go of the focus on penis/ vagina intercourse as the definition of ‘sex’, and the more we can expand our definitions of pleasure and how to experience it, the more room we can make for gender and sexual diversity, for more kinds of pleasure and love, and for sexual justice and equality.

“Of course, there are plenty of ways to do that, but… anal pleasure has incredible potential to help us lean into those edges, let go of homophobia, and heal our sexual wounding.”

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