Bachelorette star Gabby Windey shared how sex with her girlfriend Robby Hoffman feels “freeing”, “liberating” and “very safe” compared to previous male partners.
Reality star Windey, who appeared on The Bachelorette and Dancing With the Stars, came out on Instagram at the beginning of August. She announced her five-month-long relationship by posting a series of photos with comedian and writer Robby Hoffman with the caption: “Told you I’m a girl’s girl!!”
In a separate Instagram story, 32-year-old Windey – who ended her high-profile engagement to Bachelorette contestant Erich Schwer in November 2022 – admitted that dating Hoffman has been the “best experience” of her life and that she feels “like I have never felt before”.
While discussing her sex life on the podcast Just B With Bethenny Frankel, Windey opened up about getting intimate with Hoffman and why she “feels safer with a woman” in the bedroom.
“I feel less judged,” she said. “I feel like there’s nothing off limits. If I have a question, I’m going to ask, before, after, during. We will debrief on our sex life. It feels very safe.”
She continued: “I feel like that part has been really freeing for me. With us, yeah it’s a little awkward, but it’s worth it, because we want to talk about everything and we want to make sure the other person is pleased and happy.
“Sex is fun! It’s freeing, it’s liberating, especially when you do it with someone that you feel safe with … I need an emotional connection [with sex], and with Robby I feel very emotionally connected.”
It was in direct contrast to the “unrealistic” and “unsaid” expectations she encountered with men, such as her ex-fiancé. “We weren’t as open about it,” she shared. “We weren’t speaking the same language. I didn’t feel as connected.”
During the interview, Windey also shared that the queer storyline between two women in Netflix reality dating show Perfect Match “sparked something in me” and prompted her to question her sexuality.
For Windey, being a with a woman allows her to be “softer and loving” in a romantic relationship. The couple met at a bar where Hoffman was performing, exchanged numbers and eventually started dating.
“It feels just the same [dating women],” Windey shared. “It’s like I’m not even seeing her gender. I honestly do think real love transcends gender to a point, and I truly feel like that.”
“[Robby] asked me to be her girlfriend with a ring pop,” Windey said. “So cute. [It happened] two weeks in. She wrote me a little card. We are always giving each other cards. She got me these earrings for our three-month anniversary. We celebrate every month.”
In an interview on The View in August, Windey explained that she had to “navigate through the shame” after falling in love with a woman.
“What is it? Where is it coming from?” Windey asked herself. “But ultimately … I always just want to kind of do me, do what I want, figure it out later.
“It took me a while to stop questioning and start trusting,” she added. “Obviously, it’s about sexuality, but it’s also the person I met. She is so special. She makes me feel so safe, so loved. Like a love that I always wanted going on these dating shows.”